Undenied
by Tsuki Koorime
Summary: HieiBotan sonfic. The Hiei's reasons and truth against himself.


**Hi minna!**

**This is a HieiBotan songfic... I don't know how to explain this meaning fic, so, I just hope you all enjoy yourself.**

**Oh! And please, sorry my poor English. '**

**Remembers:**

_thoughts_

**music**

narrator view

- **Yu Yu Hakusho** doesn't belong to me, fortunally for them.

- The song **Undenied** belongs the extinct group **Porsthead**. It isn't mine, too. '

But, well, the pervert view of them belongs to me very much.

Ja ne!

Tsuki Koorime

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* * *

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**Undenied**

_I knew that someday, everybody falls in love._

_I thought, maybe, that I would die before it could happen to me. I thought I've already seen all the things could make a cold and desiccate heart._

_I was right, in fact._

_I knew deeply inside, I was already died._

_And everything I could want it was remain dying, slowly._

_---_

**Your softly spoken words**

**Release my whole desire**

**Undenied **

**Totally**

_---_

"I was just trying to be gentle, your jerk!" - she takes a breath, her head laying upon her shoulder, letting her ponytail touches her face along the wind - "Everybody is inside and worried about you... I didn't mean to offend you."

He turns his head to her, keeping the half-opened eyes. He whispers a bit strongly, turning back to his first position upon the snowed tree.

"Your presence offends me."

She lays down her head, stinging hard her lip, clenched fists, feeling all her body trembling with no reason.

He could not help but look at her once more by a glance. He obliges himself every time to see her running away from him, like a warning... or a comfort.

But not this time.

She clenches her fists a bit more. And she screams, with teared eyes:

"Why do you try so hard being so mean to me?!"

_---_

**And so bare is my heart**

**I can't hide**

**And so where does my heart **

**Belong?**

_---_

_I am already used just to myself. Walking trough the darkness like a flying shadow, crossing the worlds as the ice youkai with fire hands._

_That's what I am. And what I know to be._

_I'm used to look that woman and feel hate for myself._

'_Cause everything that I learned isn't enough to impede myself, every time I can, to taint her face._

_And, even when I don't want to, I still look at her._

_So many times looking at her, she screaming and going away, she crying, she complaining, and then again she smiles by some joke from another mouth._

_I would be never used to that._

_To be in love. To be for her._

_To be alive and just feel me so lost._

"Look at me, Hiei!"

_---_

**Beneath your tender touch**

**My senses can't divide**

**Oh so strong **

**My desire**

_---_

He breathes out, keeping his eyes closed, arching the eyebrows.

She comes closer, pulling softly his sleeve but touching his hand in a slip of her fingers.

He opens his eyes, startled.

She gives a step back, frightened.

"Just look..."

She whispers softly.

He breathes strongly, with his much closed eyes.

He almost can hear the lightly sound of her lips babbling, opening and closing in a insecure empty of words.

He lets go of the air, slowly.

_---_

**For so bare is my heart**

**I can't hide**

**And so where does my heart **

**Belong?**

_---_

Still with closed eyes, he jumps of the tree, impulsively, in front of her.

Hiei open his eyes, straight ahead the Botan's ones.

"What do you want to make me see, onna?"

He gives another step in her direction, his cold and harsh voice causing a little tremble at the ferry girl's eyes. He notices, feels that. Like that tremble could run below his own skin.

"I just wanna see it, Hiei."

_---_

**Now that I've found you**

**And seen behind those eyes**

**How can I carry on?**

_---_

_What do you want to see so hard, onna?_

_What I have most coldly, deadly and silently inside me?_

_There is nothing more to be seen here inside._

_There aren't even shadows of me..._

He gives just a more step, forcing her body to press against the tree. His serious look and closed lips run out to her. She winces but keeps her eyes on his face.

For a second, all her body tangles at his invisible warming touch.

His lips touch hers, by a few moments, seconds, days, in a lazy and uncountable time between them.

A warm and silent kiss, just the look she can see inside his opened eyes.

He moves away, turning out his face but not moving himself from his place.

"Now go, onna."

_There is nothing more but you inside me._

_---_

**For so bare is my heart**

**I can't hide**

**And so where does my heart **

**Belong?**

_---_

"I'm not going."

In an instinctive movement, Hiei turns back his face to Botan, his red eyes startling in front of the little and female figure, with eyes drowned in tears and a strange feeling hidden trough her lips.

She steps a hand up 'till her eyes, cleaning her chest with the large sleeve of the kimono. She takes the hand near her mouth, trying a sad and softly smile.

"I'll stay, Hiei. I'm not going out from here! Just because I don't wanna! Just because I can't! Because... there is any other place where my heart allows me to go." - She smiles, pressing her hands on - "Because just maybe I... my heart could never belong to another place. And I know, even far away, it's never gonna desert you."

He keeps there, in front of her, frozen, petrified.

Botan steps back once more. She tries to hide her face, turn out.

But before she could give the second step, she feel's a high upon her. Hiei's body lay down her shoulder, making her stop.

"Hiei...?"

"Just... stay, onna."

"Hai..."

She closes her eyes, cherishing the koorime's nape on her left shoulder.

_I knew everybody falls in love someday._

_I thought I could never be used to be someone beyond myself._

_And I knew my heart could just die slowly, every day, waiting for her._

_But I didn't know how was finally to approach._

_---_

**Belong, belong, belong...**

**-- Owari --**


End file.
